There are these moments… these moments where I feel so engulfed in emotion that I have to just stop and listen. Listen to what my mind and body is telling me. Listen to what my soul is feeling. I know this may sound totally off the-wall, flower child crazy, but its the truth. These moments I can do nothing yet think of everything. I love this feeling. This is a time where I love feeling small.
Some people might question that… but I love the feeling. It gives me a sense of reality honestly. We go day by day worried about things we can’t change, stressed about trying to change them, and thinking of new things we want to change. Our financial status, our looks, our talents. For most people, every day brings something… at least the tiniest of something. When I stare out into the water (or sky.. because I do live in Ohio and am limited as far as beaches and ocean waters go) I am given a chance to stop. All stress and overwhelming sensations cease to exist. For that time I am small… oh so very small. No matter how far you look out, you can’t find the end. It just keeps going. Beyond what you can see is more than you can imagine. Staring at something so big, with no boundaries, constantly changing gives you a sense of perspective. You might think the world is ending because you have nine assignments due at midnight and havent slept in days… but it’s not. We all have stress and problems we have to face. Every person in this world. These moments when I can just sit and think, remind me that things will always get better. A cliché as it sounds, things never stay the same forever. Everything happens for a reason so why stress on what we cant change. Focus on the now, the happy.
This is what I am working on. I have recognized that I tend to put a lot on my plate… more often than not. I run myself down without taking the time to focus on the wonderful things and people I have. I stress and stress until I can stress no more.. over the littlest of things. I am learning to let go. I am learning to move on and accept that I can’t change everything I wish to. I am learning that life has a lot more to offer than an endless cycle of anxiety and stress. Life has a lot to offer. Life is happening, and I don’t want to miss out.